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days with mama! ☆
oh madara mikejima...mikejimama....i think ive never fallen in love with a character faster...you went from an 'oh! cute design' to 'i must know everything abt u' in the span of a week...it all started back when i read beasts, the way you barged in full of energy in ch 2, totally distracting me from what i truly had started reading the story for...i do not mind! not at all!
yr so strong and so caring, fighting for what you think is right and what can guarantee the happiness and well-being of those around you...just! how was i supposed to NOT love you? the amount of comfort and happiness a single smile from you can give me simply amazes me, and thats what you always wanted wasnt it? even before the masks, even before you started assigning yourself those antagonistic roles...you have always loved idols and how they made people happy havent you?
even if youre going thru a dark path atm, its not too late to continue making that dream a reality! yr not alone, mama, you might not ever be able to fullfill all of those unachievable goals you have set to keep you behind, but, you dont have to play house anymore. just look around! look how far you have come! you have people who love you, and thats all what family should be about isnt it? friends, family...its a very thin line, yet you sometimes act as if you were blind, you dumb, thick-headed man! it truly infuriates me, honestly! just how blind do you have to be to not notice how much they care about you?
but, deep down, im sure you know, you know leaving them behind will hurt them in the end, even if you may think its for the best - even if you may think theyre better off without you, thats simply not true. they dont need to be protected, your job isnt to protect them - thats not how relationships work, when will you stop seeing yourself as a mere tool? all you are doing now...you dont care about the consequences because you dont THINK it will matter in the end right? mama...oh mama...
you are many things but a bad person isnt definetely one of those! you have done things you might regret, but you have shown your true colors multiple times, when you allow yourself to be weak - vulnerable, when you allow yourself to enjoy being around those you love...i will never forget all you did for anzu, even if you try to push her away, even if the way you got close to her wasnt right at all, feelings arent a bad thing, theyre not a weakness, and even if you might insist its all fake, its not a mask either. you told everyone you loved festivals, you ARE mr festival in the flesh...yet! you try to make us believe you didnt enjoy it at all? you might have resorted to that persona bc of the situation yr parents put you in but...
what you said to kanata back then, in aquarium, im not sure that was completely a lie; do you feel free whenever its a festival? do you allow yourself to take the mask off, while everyone puts it on? i hope, you can at least have that for you, mama, because theres nothing i want more for you than happiness...to see your smile, the prettiest one in the entirety of enstars, such a radiant and kind sight that seems forced most of the time...but, those that are softer, gentler, those sincere ones are worth a million times more than any of the other ones
your feature scout truly made me sob for a very long time, because, despite everything that has happened, you are back - not the persona, who loves festivals a worrying amount, but mike-kun, the bright kid who didnt allow himself to be happy while everyone else did, or at least, thats what i like to think, that youre allowing yourself to finally smile for real, things are hard, your life is far from normal but, you deserve good things mikejimama, you deserve to be more than what you have restricted yourself to be, you deserve to be able to walk, talk and love without any mask on at all, just as madara
this has gotten...embarrasingly long...and i dont even feel like i have said all the things i wanted to say, nor am i sure if this is even readable but...mama, you are very important to me, and lots of people as well, both in real life and around you, it might be hard to get it inside your head, but take care of yourself okay? dont do something dumb you would regret, what will we do without our mama if you do? i love you mikejima madara, i truly do, thank you so much, for everything!
days with sou~!
suo suo suo~ you are such a weird kid honestly! thats probably what made me love you soooo much! it all started due to a silly echolalia moment and yet! even if it wasnt for real, even if i told myself you were just kind of these, just 'okay', you really caught my attention while watching! you were so silly and you failed so much at that wannabe adult thing you had going on, and on top of that! you always threw bits of english around, it was simply adorable, how could i not want to bother this kid!
your feature scout came around, and by that time i was already in too deep, with your perfect engrish and love for sweets i knew there was no going back. but you are more than all that, and even if i love making fun of you, you are truly an amazing kid, but you dont like being called that dont you? you are so young i just cant help it! i will cut it out yeah yeah...
tsukasa suou, king of knights, and the noblest of them all, you started with a disadvantage, with everyone way ahead of you, with everyone playing a game you did not know the rules of, yet! that never stopped you, you fought alongside them, you beat them in their own game and you did all that with a smug grin on your face! ah oh how annoying...you truly are a brat, whether you like it or not, but thats what makes suo suo~!
your dedication to your role, to your knights, is simply admirable, you are an amazing king and leader, and dont let anyone stop you from fighting for what you think is right. however, thats not all you are, you were born with a heavy weight on your shoulders, a title you shaped yourself to fit in perfectly, and its hard, i know, you had to grow up and had to sacrifice many things for that, but suo, whether you like it or not, you are a kid, and its okay to act like it, even if you may find it embarrasing (your childish side is also soo~oo cute <3)
you thought for a long time that there were many things you couldnt do, but that doesnt matter anymore, it doesnt matter in yumenosaki, allow yourself to make friends, allow yourself to be silly because you want (and not because youre angry and i find it funny)! you have friends and although you might not know the 'instructions', although you might feel a bit dumb to not understand things everyone else does, they love you and they are all more than eager to help you catch up on everything you missed! its ok be young, to act childish, if you dont enjoy it now, then when? dont be so uptight suo, allow yourself to have as much fun as you want ~
you dont have to be something you are not, even if i know this isnt the case, if you ever feel like its all too much, being just a kid is enough, being just suou is okay too y'know? yr parents love you so much, they will love you no matter what path you decide to take, and if they dont, screw them! all your friends, your second family - knights, and i will always be there to support whatever makes you happy, thats the only thing that truly matters, never forget that okay? the future can be scary, i know! but nothing is set in stone, your future is no ones but yours, tsukasa suou, and if you think otherwise, make it yours
i! didnt think i would manage to write this much wow, there are a million things i want to tell you, to gush about you, about how cute you are when you are embarrassed, or how your eyes sparkle whenever theres something sweet around...but! i dont think everything needs to be said, sometimes words arent enough, i think you already know how much you mean to me and if you dont, well, thats stuuuupid~! im not gonna say it again! you already have a bunch of pharagraphs above that prove just how much i can ramble about you my loving knight who lives in my head rent free, literally, please stop nagging me
i would like to say so many things more but my fingers are already hurting and i REFUSE to cry again, no suo go away!! dont make me suffer with your future event 5* young man thats all i ask for in return, MWAH kisses yr forehead, never change!
